advise on how to run

...yourself into the ground.

This is exactly what it was like except
 imagine her awake and running

The weekend was bright and sunny, there was no snow and the parks and streets were full of people. In my current mode of regular exercise I knew I must be a part of the "happening"- I decided to take a bike ride but, though sunny, it was also 10F (aka  -12C), not including the wind! Had I found my balaclava I would've braved it and pedaled off in search of polar bears. Instead the thought of riding without hat and face covering was too much. I'm not a native New Englander so there is nothing hardy about me. However, I remained intrepid and so donned my running shoes and made ready for my first outdoor run in about a year. As I was about to leave, the house husky intervened and demanded to join in. She had already had a long walk earlier but it seemed churlish to deny a winter runner a rare chance. So, leashed up we set off. I thought my problem would be stopping her from sniffing but I had forgotten, she is a husky, once she got going there was no stopping. Everytime I slowed down she pulled. 3.5 miles and near death I arrived home (now I realize 3.5 miles is no big distance but remember, the most running I have done in the last few years is 2.5 miles on the treadmill at a max of 5mph. The route we took, averaged just under 6mph, involved trail, hills, soft turf and everything else, - a lot of fun if one is ready for the challenge but increasingly onerous to the unfit jogger.
I think the biggest problem was that, unlike biking, where there are frequent coasting moments, running  is 100% slog BUT, if you want to run and to be pushed (or perhaps I mean pulled), there is no better running partner than a husky. Otherwise, I advise Basset hounds for a more sedate pace more consistent with rare running ventures.

after the long silence

I am back and exercising but, I admit it - i fell off the wagon, so much so that I couldn't even be bothered to make a new year's resolution to exercise or self improve in any manner whatsoever. It wasn't that I had any really good reason, simply that I had a complete loss of motivation, at all levels. It wasn't depression, more of an ennui with perhaps a soupçon of despair at ever developing a lifestyle change that really was. One couldn't help but consider how many years (and they are many) of struggle and travail have gone into exercising without truly embracing daily exercise and healthy eating as a part of who I am.  This despite the fact that there really are times I enjoy exercise and feel on top of the world during and after BUT, it is not a core element that defines me. Maybe I must accept that.
Perhaps it is the struggle itself that is of most value and the physical elements actually pale by comparison with the spiritual aspects of the "journey". I don't know. The point though is that I simply stopped doing anything active for a few weeks, perhaps I needed a real break. Now I am back on the treadmill - literally, not metaphorically. I am not sure that my motivation has really come back but for some reason I have picked myself up and started to work out again. Yesterday a fair weights session, today a decent jog indoors and I'm pretty sure there will be more tomorrow and beyond.

Perhaps, this return reflects that the lifestyle has become more innate within me after all, hmmm, with that hopeful thought I wish all good struggles.

p.s. I know there are a load of cliches - they are on purpose - honest, consider it part of my dissipating ennui if you must, I just thought they were apropos for this post.